I sat down and thought about where my life is heading, I can’t seem to think what’s really missing. I was asked by a close friend if I was really ready to move on with life and I had no response to his question. I have a fear for my future after seeing things around me. I hear people not agreeing and I don’t understand what’s really missing in their lives. I feel like I’m trapped in a place where I have no one to talk to or even look to for advice. Yet I still keep living for the sake of myself and others. I can’t seem to close my eyes and just dream that this is not real. I want to feel as there is more to life, but where to start is the true question. How do I pull myself out of this loneliness, that’s filled with sadness? I’m not depressed, but just sad thinking why is this happening to me, what did I do to deserve this. But if I open my eyes and truly look it’s not just happening to me it’s happening to my whole family.

As I look at my past, I see so many mistakes that I made, is this something that is reflecting my future. I think about the days I was in school and how I didn’t take things seriously then. I look and see the greatest opportunities that were available to be then and regret not following my dreams in pursuing for a better future. I remember a particular friend that was close to my heart and I pushed him away by turning my back on him. Now thinking about it I feel I was scared of the out coming results. Till this day I still think about him and try to resolve things. We are still friends today but it’s not the same.

I recently learned about someone that made a mistake in life and if that person could take it back they would, but what’s done is done. Thinking about that person’s mistake, makes me think if I should be a part of it. I can’t ignore the situation knowing that it’s occurred to someone close to me. I want to be a part of that person’s mistake, though I don’t know how to ask them whether it’s ok or not. I want to learn more about that person’s mistake and see how close that person is to their mistake. Is this mistake going to be part of this person for a life time or just a brief part of life? So many questions and thoughts come to mind, but where to get the answers is just a mystery.

Wait I should be looking at life from a different prospect, I mean at least I have a life that I can live normally. If I open my eyes wide enough I can see that there are so many that are struggling with either an illness or a location where life isn’t easy. People everywhere have their own problems and situations that they are dealing with and some have people they can talk to while others have no one to understand them. I have an open heart for all those that can’t live their lives like they want to because of what was brought onto them. I have a heart for those that live in a place where nature takes its course to make changes while destroying what’s in its path.